a word to the hurting

There are a lot of things (most of them from tough moments) that I will never know (while here on earth) why they happened. We cannot always trace God's hand in life, but we are given the option to trust His heart. This may be hard to digest, when the depth of our pain is beyond description.

I have been at the point where I hurt so bad that I could not believe as true a verse of Scripture I had known for years: "all things work for good for those who love God and are called according to His purpose". I'd known that verse for years, shared it with others, believed it for myself.

Then something in life happened so raw and hurtful that I could not believe that verse when it was shared with me. I was honest enough to tell the person "I know that verse, but in all honesty I cannot believe it true for me in my life now." That's how much I hurt. And God appreciated my honesty when I told Him this same thing. And He appreciates your honesty with Him too, wherever your heart is.

He welcomes being able to prove and show Himself, if we're willing to shake off all the religion and erroneous stuff we're fed about His nature through church, TV, the opinions of others, etc. and go straight to Him. I know part of my problem for so long was getting my information and opinion of Him from sources other than He Himself.

Anyone who wants religion can have it, I'll take Jesus thank you very much. Religion is man's idea of what and who God is, and the overwhelming majority of it is dead wrong about His nature, His love, His strength, His power.

Religion does not welcome the hurting. Religion expects you to be happy and blessed. Religion says to wear a smile and tell everyone you're doing fine...even when you are not.

Jesus Christ hates religion.

Jesus wants you to be raw and honest with Him. If you're hurt, downtrodden, pissed--Jesus wants you to tell Him so, just like that. He doesn't want you to put on some fake aura of reverence or get-it-togetherness before you come talk to Him. He wants to hear your heart as it is, with your words and your language, letting Him know EXACTLY how it is. Would doing so include some rough language and choice words in sharing your heart to Jesus? Maybe. Maybe not. Either way, He wants to hear it straight, all of it, how your heart wants to say it. Don't hold anything back: don't hold back your words, don't hold back your tone, don't hold back your heart. Lay it out full throttle. That's what Jesus wants you to do.

Religion tells you to ignore or shun your feelings, and be something you're not. Religion tells us we are to have a certain disposition about us if we're going to approach God/Jesus.

Jesus says "Come talk to me, raw. Don't make up your hair or your face. Don't put on certain clothes. Don't 'prepare' in any way, shape or form. Forget that! I want to hear straight from your heart."

You wonder if Jesus really says this? Know this, He scorns the pompous, self-righteous and indignant.

"Woe to you, you actors and pretenders! For you shut the kingdom of heaven in men's faces; for you neither enter yourselves, nor do you allow those who are about to go in to do so." (Matthew 23:13)

The ground is level at the foot of the cross. You and I stand equal there. None of us is higher than anyone else, nor lower.

I don't know if this is a challenge or an encouragement. But I simply say to shake off all the stuff that is preached and that American believers share with each other how God is. Drop all that stuff, and go to the Cross with whatever is bottled up inside and let it out. Strong, emotional, angry, hurt--whatever it is, be raw and honest with Him about it. Let it fly. Don't worry about using a respectful, reserved tone because it's Him. Let the true sentiment of your heart loose. However long, however strong, and tell Jesus. This may sound crazy, but He WANTS to hear the true emotion of your heart. He can take it. He doesn't want you to hold back.

Then, when you've let it out in totality and He has absolutely heard it all, true and raw, do one or two things. (1) listen. See what He says to your heart and spirit. If you sense nothing, then maybe there is something more to get off your chest. (2) ask Him for a trade. I'm going to personalize something Jesus said while on earth and make it for you. Jesus says to you, "Come to me, (say your name). You are weary, and burdened. I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, (your name), for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your soul. For my yoke is easy and my burden light, (your name)."

Jesus wants to make a trade with you. He wants your pain, your hurt, your ache, your anger, your brokenness, your anguish--from anything current or past. He is asking YOU for it. Yes, yours. What you have experienced and have carried (or are still carrying) with you.

Please don't be like me. When I drifted from Him, it started off as disappointment, and grew into a jaded resentment. My faith waned. I didn't hang on just a little bit further til He would have brought me out into the clear. I was impatient toward His timing on things.

The result? I strayed for twelve years. Wandering. Hurting. Avoiding. Acting out. Bitter. Empty.

Wanna know something? I was going to church for 10 of those 12 years.

I was going to church. I wasn't going to Jesus.

I went to church, expecting that some miracle sermon about pain was going to right my ship, or that some brother or sister was going to be sent over to me by the Lord and say "The Lord has revealed to me you might be hurting. Will you share?"

Could that have happened? Yes, but it didn't. And though it COULD have happened, the problem is I was not looking to God. I was looking to man in God's house. Huge difference, and a huge mistake on my part. Don't make my mistake.

Brothers and sisters can be a great ear, and they can be a shoulder and/or a voice of wisdom (if they have godly wisdom). Fellowship is great, but do NOT have the expectation that another Christian is going to be the key to the healing of your heart. As long as you look to man to do what only God can do, you're going to be disappointed, and wasting your time looking to the wrong source.

Man can give empathy. Man can be a voice that they have been through similar or know what you're going through. But only your spending time with Jesus at the cross and spending time letting the Holy Spirit minister to you are going to do the real healing.

I don't know where your heart is now. If you're still not as close to Him as at some period of life before (or never been close to Him at all), if you're disappointed still on a large scale from what has happened in your life, God is okay with this, whether this entails being angry at Him about it or not.

Do you wonder or doubt if God could really understand what's going on? Read Psalm 139.

He is perfectly fine with where you are about it all. Unfortunately, from American church preaching we now have this idea that things have to be good in order to approach God. We go to Him when things are blessed, to ask for more blessing. Hogwash. Jesus wants you to talk with Him now exactly as you are, wherever your heart is: wounds, hurting or whatever.

Do not believe the lie that you have to be at a certain point or level of happiness or blessedness to approach the Lord. That is a lie from the pit to try and keep you from going to God as things are. Jesus said time and again that He came for the brokenhearted, the captives, the prisoners, the sick. I had it all wrong for years. In my inner heart, raw honest, I knew I wasn't walking with Him, and instead of coming into His light I hid like Adam & Eve. Guess what? There's nowhere to hide. God knows.

Why do we think we can hide from Him? It's cause we're hurt. We're hurt and so we put the hand out at arms length. And we don't come to Jesus because we see all the fake smiles on Sunday morning and do the superficial "how are you? Great, how are you" talk with fellow believers, and we think we're not supposed to be gut honest and truthful with Him about our hurts.

And it breaks His heart that we don't come to Him with our burdens, our wounds. Jesus says, to YOU and ME, "I came for the brokenhearted", "I'll trade my easy burden for all your pain and garbage", "Blessed are those whose spirit is broken".

These are His words, spoken then...and spoken now to us. Do we take Him at His word and see if He'll come through? Are we prideful to not let our guard down and admit our weaknesses and hurts to Him.

Jesus said "My strength is made perfect in your weakness" (2 Corinthians 12:9). The Word also says God's weakness is stronger than man's strongest strength (1 Corinthians 1:25). Do we come to the Lord when we're weak, broken and say so? Do we stay prideful and stubborn? Do we snub His offer to deliver on His promise and ability to not only heal our wounds but give us His strength, not as the world gives or knows strength, but His strength?

Don't we teach our kids the "Jesus Loves Me" song, whose lyrics include "I am weak, but He is strong"? Do we practice what we preach? Do we give lip service to God's strength, His healing, His touch? Or do we come to Him with our broken heart, our anger, our anguish? Are we too hurt to? Too scared? Too prideful?

When God stung me in a microburst to get my attention earlier this year, my twelve years of pride in not wanting to be honest with Him about my wounds and subsequent rebellion was gone real quick. I was too prideful to simply go to Him and have an honest talk with Him.

I had refused for twelve years to come to Him with my heart full of disappointments, so He put me on my back to get me to look up at Him, and I'm better for it. "The Lord corrects those He loves, just as a father the son who he delights in" (Prov 3:12)

If there is hurt in you, please don't be a fool like me. I had a storehouse of anger, but wouldn't go to the Lord. His heart hungers more than you can imagine for you to come to Him with whatever you have in your heart. Scars, current wounds, anger and all.

Again, I don't know if this is an encouragement or a challenge. Get alone, and go to the cross...with everything, and lay it out. Honest, angry, whatever is inside you. Don't hold back. Speak your language to Jesus. This is Jesus you're talking to--the guy who hung out with sinners and robbers. He is not like the high-brow, judgmental, religious, prim and proper people who'll gasp at the language you might use in talking about your wounds. He wants and appreciates unfiltered truth.

Then listen, and/or ask for a trade--your crud and all you've felt, for the easy burden He offers. You will be absolutely blown away by what happens.