it's already beginning, of course

Well well well, here we are again. The six-week time of year where people engage in trying to have others believe things which are truly not.

I've got a job where I interact with the public on a daily basis, and just like clockwork here it is. People have turned on their "nice" switch and for six weeks are already pretending as though they care more than they actually do.

I wouldn't hate this time of year, except for how rift with fakery and pretention it is.

Is there some good come about from people being this way during this time? Sure, and I won't knock that. What ticks me is that in January these same folks will flip that same switch off and go back to being Hyde instead of Jekyl until next November twenty-something.

This exposes the niceness of this six weeks as, let's be honest, a bunch of chicanery and shallowness.

I would rather people be the same all the time. Why do this in December when you won't be doing so in March? Why are you going out of your way in November, when the rest of the year it's all about your "me and my schedule" mentality?

But this is the time of year for people to crank up the penance into hyperdrive. We're assholes and bitches for 46 weeks of the year...let's pretend for six to make up for all the rest.

Quite honestly, and I can only speak for me, I'd rather you be an asshole or a bitch like you are the rest of the year. Slathering on the fakery shouts pretention to me, and I'd rather have people's true self than the attempts to deceive. Attempts to make me think they are what they truly aren't.

Another part of this year is the b.s. that people send through their Christmas cards. Everyone puts on nice clothes and smiles real big, so they can project to the world what happy and together people they are.

The truth of the matter is their life and their year is filled largely with strife and underwhelmingness. The reality of emotional roller coaster, hoodwinking women who talk a big game, and the men who distance themselves from this by burying themselves in work, civic affairs, church, naughty pictures, men's groups, other activities.

I wouldn't mind this time of year except for what I know will happen in January. And so these people I interact with in public? They're still going to slosh around the cheery comments, and as much as I can't stand it I'm resigned to it. They're going to speak as though they truly and sincerely wish me well, but the truth is they don't give a rat's ass. And the truth also is that come January this temporary chirpiness will return to the normal scowls and impatience.

Give me your scowls and impatience now too, please. I prefer the real you over the attempt to be placated. But we both know that isn't what's going to happen. And so I'll continue to simply bite my lip and give a silent half-nod as you wish me a Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays and all that.

If I had my druthers, you wouldn't wish me jack shit. But since it is part of your annual penance and makes you feel better, knock yourself out. There's not a God damn thing merry or happy about my life, but since people think the mere expression of words changes dark realities, go ahead and tickle yourself pink. I'm sorry you feel you have to say those things.